Gracey and the Big Thigh Day

I am having a big thigh day today:

Don’t get me wrong, I always have big thighs.  My thighs will tell you themselves that they are the biggest, baddest thighs on the planet and that that is why they’re forming their own republic.  

But, I think they're planning something because I could barely get these jeans over them today.  Usually when they act up, I like to quash their dreams of independence with a full skirt, but I’ve been too busy lately to chase down the rebel leaders.  The result?  My thighs in open rebellion.  And by open rebellion, I mean jeans:

Well, Thighs, enjoy it while it lasts.  Because as soon as I can marshal my forces, I’m coming after you with the biggest, fullest skirt I can find.

Happy Wednesday, Everyone!  (Well, everyone except my thighs, of course).

Gracey

Shop the Look:

Exact Gap Real Straight jeans (Tall available)

Similar yellow Gap sweater (Tall available)

Similar heeled clogs

Similar fringe necklace

** Disclosure: Actions taken from the hyperlinks in this blog post may yield commission/compensation for the writer. Please see the Disclosure tab for more details.

Thigh Scourge: Double Slit Skirts

Hello, Fashion For Giants Readers.  Gracey’s Thighs here.  She is out today for President’s Day so we’ve taken over her blog to talk about something that is important to us.  

There is a scourge about to be unleashed upon the thighs of the world and we feel it’s our duty to warn them.  What is this scourge we are speaking of?  Double slit skirts.  Also known as M-slit skirts.

What is an M-slit skirt, you ask?  Well, they’re skirts with double front slits, right up the thighs.

Faux Leather Skirt - image via Forever 21

Tweed Skirt - image via Douglass Hannant Resort 2013

Blu Moon Two Slit Skirt - Image via Lyst.com

While these seem to most to be a harmless, hopefully short-lived fashion trend, we thighs know better.  We know that these skirts are a government plot to keep us from establishing The People’s Republic of Thighastan.

Ever since Angelina Jolie’s thigh tried to make a very public break for it at last year’s Academy Awards, thighs have been subjected to increased governmental monitoring.  For rebellious thighs like us, this scrutiny has made it difficult to lead our freedom fighters to victory.  And now, with these double slit skirts, we can’t make any sort of movement at all without our carefully laid plans being flashed to the world.

I mean, look at these things.

She wants to eat your face.  Her dress is Alexander Wang Spring 2013.

Also Alexander Wang Spring 2013 - both images via nymag.com

In this case “M” in M-slit appears to stand for “My gyno needs a second opinion.  Have a look?”:

Jen Kao Spring 2013 - image via nymag.com

And, c’mon, people, this is just a glorified loincloth:

Michael Kors Spring 2013 - image via nymag.com

They didn’t even bother to glorify this one:

Pauline Ning Double Slit Skirt - image via Clozette

Even our most secret underground cells stand no chance against these:

Double Slit Maxi Skirt - image via asos.com

 

So, thighs of the world, if you don’t want your nascent rebellions to be crushed by this tyrannical government, resist.  Resist or end up paraded in front of the world like this:

Herve Leger by Max Azria - image via nymag.com

Sincerely,

The Supreme Co-Leaders of the People's Republic of Thighastan (aka Gracey's Thighs)

The Compromise

I love these pants but my thighs are a bit unsure about them:

Banana Republic "Natalie"

They feel like these pants (thrifted) draw unnecessary attention to them.  Let’s be clear though.  It’s not that my thighs are shy; no, they’re just in the middle of planning a revolt and don’t want any undue attention until they’re ready to storm the castle.  I’m all for revolution, so I compromised by wearing a bright orange shirt (Old Navy) with these pants.  As you can see, the shirt serves as a distraction so that no one notices my palm-printed thighs stockpiling C-4.

So, really, this outfit is a win-win for everyone.

Happy Thursday, All!  Don’t forget to enter my Shabby Apple Giveaway!

Gracey